tHebrokeNwiNgsoFThEfaLLenangeL

Messed Up

2007-02-06T00:07:00.000-08:00

it feels like coming down on the core of my soul the piercing pain i felt yesterday.. to choose between two person is such a stupid thing to do,. if two is too much and three is poisonous.. maybe thats why im dying slowly.,. these people around me dont really realize what the world is doing.. all the hardship and stupidity.. i cant remake the wrong things that i've done then.. but why do i make the same mistakes over and over again.. i keep hurting each and everyone of them.. its like vomiting nonstop until you cry.. the never ending promise and regrets keep haunting me in my sleep., when everything vanished in just a blink of the eye everthing is gone,, ruined,, rebuild,, and destroyed again.. messed up...

....

2006-09-02T01:20:00.000-07:00

We can never return to the past and can never see the future..all we can do is realize that everything around us is not eternal.. so while were still here,. do what it takes to live your life to the fullest.. embrace everyone you care for.. smile at every people you know.. scream at the top of your lungs..let the world know how you feel.. laugh endlessly 'til your stomache hurts..sing your favorite song over and over. tell the person you value most how they really mean to you.. for they might not really know what's their worth.. friends can easily come and go..songs may fade away their lyrics we may never remember but atleast it turned our life around...get another hair cut if your friends tell you so cause they maybe right.. love yourself for being you cause you know inside that what really makes you unique is that thing that youre really hating..
you can kill an ant they may call you an ant bully... so what?.. who cares?.. never let anyone pursue you in doing something that may draw you away from the one whom you really love... if you really want to succeed learn how to play the game.. the art of losing is one thing but the book of winning is a never ending tales of those with wounded knees standing up to strive more in life that's full of challenge. Never promise someone anything if you dont really mean doing it.
Stay away from those you try to stab you in the back.. Never be so insecure of yourself cause you may never know there's someone out there looking at you as if you were the most beautiful thing God has ever created. We're all perfect in the eye's of our own mother.. but if you look inside yourself you might see that same peculiar person wanting to scream away from you..Crying is showing the world you're tough..No one ever said that life's going to be easy they just said it's worth the effort.. Never lie to those who really know you cause they can easily tell if you're doing so...Leave a little love for yourself.No one said being in love means means being insane. When you leave this world think of me cause you might also see me there holding on to you..

pictures....

2006-07-07T01:25:00.000-07:00

my thoughts are made to be spoken,,but my lips is sealed,, my brain is made to inspire not to expire...XP

2006-06-29T21:01:00.000-07:00

“Life”

From your first peak into this world up to this day. God gave us freedom to live the way we want to. But how come, some want to end theirs...Not thinking bout those who died young never in their wildest dream that they’ll leave this world soon…Those suffering from illness that’s killing them and eating them inside. No one really knows what its like to be dead, not to feel and be lifeless buried underground. When you got everything and something went awry, you should stand up and make a difference. Don’t go throw away your life away, compared to others your problem is puny, whether it’s because of a failing mark, a huge break up, departure of someone, family problems, fight with someone and immeasurable failure. Don’t make a fuss about a little problem. Be like Spongebob Squarepants he absorbs everytjhing then let it all go by squeezing himself. You’re so blessed to be alive and praise God for everything you have. There’s nothing I hate more than someone taking for granted his own life. If you have peers and persons close to you that you can’t leave behind, just a single thought of them keeps you alive and you still have a pinch of hope and faith in sight then you’re not ready to die. You’re not ready to be in the abyss of silence and the piercing peace.

huh

2006-05-15T23:26:00.000-07:00

have a busy week ahead of me,, how come im caught up with everyone's life,, but not mine huh?,, ahhh,. cant help myself from hating someone and loving voldemort at the same time.. what's with that? i watched A.A before going here it's super funny,, you'll laugh your guts out haha im looking at some blogs and im really amaze on how a blog can be part of your life haha im hating this p.c right now uh.....later dudes i'll do what i have to do first ciao!

im inlove with this color...

sugar and spice?

2006-05-08T05:07:00.000-07:00

haha,, i bored,, super,, at last i got the chance to get the hell out of that boredo chamber of doom a.k.a our house,, i wanna watch the Da Vinci code,, im so bummed,, im gaining weight according to my mother,, cause of lack of sleep i tend to eat more than usual,, uh-oh red lights alerting my head,, kanina i went to mom's office we played Bingo on their lunchtime,, i won 173 pesos haha not bad aye? im suppose to eat at jobee but instead we went to my tita's pace we ate bbq yum yum,, i wanna go to batangas,, so bad that i can taste it haha,, i'll post something tomorrow,, mwah!

2006-03-31T04:38:00.000-08:00

wed. 03/29/06
a flirt in a skirt, , that's what i am that day everybody's looking as if that's the only time they saw someone wearing a skirt,. aha!,, even though i woke up with a major headache it's still good im in a good mood way back then and i was suddenly pulled back by realizing the date,, 29 how i hate that no. waaaAhhmmp... -end-
thurs. 03/30/06

im useless woke up pass 9 and didnt get the chance to watch yakitate earlier i just sleep and eat and sleep and eat over and over again im so bored ... derder keep teasing me -end-
today. friday 03/31/06
ahh,, i feel like crap,, im starting to feel cold all of a sudden,,
haha,, anyway moving on,, im so bored i've cleaned up our sala and my ro0m,, aha yey me!,, well so much for that i've learned today that you can't force someone to notice what you've done good if their too busy criticizing you.. i'll just rest my pretty little head and stop thinking bout things..

2006-03-27T03:41:00.000-08:00

aha..so many things happened this past few days..errr weeks..im so proud to say i made some changes in me.. well i think it's for the best.. i haven't really had a "ME-TiMe" so i suppose this summer i'll run off somewhere and soul-search.. ^aha^ i want to go somewhere,buy books and take pictures..im kinda bored but my head aches so much,, im missing somebody but i think he doesn't want me anymore even though his my best friend he moved away from me when i told him i already have a boyfriend,, he's the one who said that i should go with ^derder^.. i mean it's not my fault right?,, he's the one who pushed me to go,, ahhHh.. it's making my head hurt so bad,,!!!,, i wanna buy lotsa boardshorts and flip flops,, i want to spend most of my summer days in the beach i dont care if i become a niggah,, "I JUST DON'T CARE" so much for my ranting ,, im gonna do html testi,, bye for now..

angel's voices/addiction/onegaisimasu!

2006-01-20T03:09:00.000-08:00

damn!,, hearing angel's voices,, i fell asleep while im in the church,, haha embarassing much!,, well it's that girl's fault,, her voice is so soothing,, hai maybe i just lack sleep,, tsk tsk tsk poor me,, my addiction is coming back,, oh! how i hate my ragnarok buddies!,, their always pushing me to play wahahaha,, when i opened the stupid p.c I was hopeless! i saw the freekin ragnarok patch and i cant help myself,, I opened it,, aarRrrghhh! goOd thing my load in ragnarok expired years ago,,wahaha,, kidding maybe just a couple of months,,my GOd the inner addict in me wants to come out...,,,! waaahh!!!oh my God i wish i never left my cp at home,, i wanna talk to minam he'll know what to do,, goodness,, im being hyper again,,, i just hope i can talk to somebody right now bout ragnarok,, amp,, i miss everything rarr!!!,,,Patrick is way ahead of me,, his character is in third job while mine is only at the second one,, huhu poor me,, damn i really wanna open the damn thing,, amp amp amp amp!!!!,, FAWK!,, help me somebody,,!! onegaishimasu!

mwahhh!!

2005-12-09T03:51:00.000-08:00

the play is great,, really,, so funny,, exciting,, i wanna,, make a new layout for my blog
but i cant cause my pc broke down a month ago,, really without my pc,, im wasted,, i miss everything,,
gawsh,, im hopeless,, im an addict,, im getting tall nah,, i can feel it,, haha dont tell ate but im taller than her na,,
haha,, she would go dramatic,,
my bhe broke his cp,, nyahaha,, i dunno if im going to talk to him pah,, saddy
anyway,, his pamangkin is so cute,,, gwabe,, mwahz to pau kyut!
i love mahself!!!haha so vain,, i love my bhe,, mwah mwah,, mwah,,
kanina inis akoh dun sa driver ng jeep kc im wearing a skirt tingin ba naman ng tingin,,
so nakakabastos kaya,, hmmp,,
im tired nah pero wanna talk to rodel pah,,
la nah akoh pampayad ditoh sa pagrerent koh,, haha
buh-bye!!mwahhugz!!!love y'all tnx for reading!!

i cant anymore !

2005-12-02T03:56:00.000-08:00

im really sad today even if i watched Harry Potter4

he didnt come..he said he would.

he broke his biggest promise ever.

i dont know if my decision is right.

but i'll stand my ground.

i wont be shaken.

it really pains me to do those things

to say those things.

i know im stupid to do that

what can i do?

just stop the hurting right?

i dont want to end up broken again just like the last time

the one who left me..

im not hurting anymore with his past actions

but this present of mine

IMPOSSIBLE to ignore

anyway...hooray! this is my latest post!hooo!!!

hooray me!hehehe

p.s damn faith is really playing with me this time i might cry infront of the p.c but i dont want i'll look stupid...

saD...angrY...FrustratEd

2005-07-07T00:44:00.000-07:00

ahhh i wanna die. . .im so SLEEPY. . .dont know what to feel anymore. . .badtrip sa schoOL lahat mali. . .fine. . .bahala kayo. .i dont care na. .amp. .waaahhh. . .ehjhaypotpot how i hate you today I dont care if you dont care. . .ahhh bad trip talaga ang sarap pumatay ng tao. . .haha gagawa ako ng blog sa fwendster la lang. . .

lazy...weee

2005-06-09T12:46:00.000-07:00

im to damn lazy to write anything today...lol...\m/

maybe i'll post something later..jeez i hope so...

again..jez SMILE

2005-06-06T19:00:00.000-07:00

wee..another entry...haha..i can still see the blood...our keyboard is stained with my own BLOOD..it looks nice..sigh..i told kym that my soul is lost again..where the heck is it?..i guess he got it...remember the ONE who i cant text nor call?..well lets just call him you-know-who hahaha...wee..im thinking that he got my soul..my being...sheesh..i really wanna go to school nah...i miss them especially DADDY CHUCK...haha..i told kym i want a new layout...she said she'll make me one..wee..im gonna change my layout soon...lalala...watch out..another series comin...!yep...another series from the saiyuki trilogy...watched the first episode..i cant really understand what their sayin cause ANIMAX wont dub the series..and forgot to put the english subtitles...but Sanzo is really HOT..kawaii..it's official my globe sim card is lost...dang...stupid me..demo daigobu..huh? what the heck am i typing?...anyways im unlimited pah din..wee...!go SUN...im so loving it...!!weee...im bored nah to write ..im just faking my smile...holla

=VaiN=

2005-06-05T22:18:00.000-07:00

at last another entry wee....stop....lalala...geez what kind of entry is this?...sleep all day..hahaha..that song is made foh me...hahaha..kiddin'..im tired nah..pero i can write pa naman eh...i must...i should i shall...wahahahaha...my battery is low again that's the second time today..sheesh...kym's really something..my kuya called me "ADEK" cause i was surfing the net even though our mouse is broken...he said wow galing naman iba na talaga ang adek...lol...asa xa...weee...i found another headset...i tried it and it worked..haha...go natali go..!hahaha..im being stupid again...wee..talking to myself is not healthy...hahaha..i miss my blog so much...lol...i looked at the mirror then i saw a zombie...yep twas me alright...im namumutla...my lips are pale...even my ate noticed it she said "my sakit ka bah?"...my eye bags are huge..damn...im missing someone but i cant call him nor text him cause pampagulo lang ako sa life nya...inaabuso namin ni kym ang sun...lakas signal sun pag gabi...wee...hahaha..it's raining again...happy..waaahh i miss him na talaga...fawk...anong gagawin ko dito magiiyak?..fawk wak na lang...its been a week since my pup went missing...asar...my dream last night was really weird..really really weird..how i wish tomorrow's our first day in school i so miss them...watched escaflowne the movie last night its so nice bloody hands...nice...bravo...hahaha..what to write..what to write...hmmmn...got nothing else to write...sayonara..! :)

quiz addicT?

2005-05-09T19:08:00.000-07:00

You're like me! The intelligent loner. You're shy
at times but friendly, and you are never weak
and always independent. You are incredibly
intelligent (wise beyond your years) and have a
talent for many things (sports, music, art).
You have a kind and warm personality and enjoy
the simple things. Like hanging out with
friends and watching movies at home. But you're
sometimes quiet nature makes you a bit of an
outcast and a mystery to people. No matter how
pretty you are or smart or athletic, you just
can't seem to break into the crowd and be
noticed. Don't worry, try to be more outgoing
and speak out when you have more to say. Don't
hide behind your books and sports and computer,
get out there and get noticed. You also have
deep desires in life and feel vunerable and
alone at times. Don't feel sad either, What
helps me to express feelings and dreams that I
can't say to people, is through my writting.
Maybe you should try.

What kind of girl are you? (with pix!)
brought to you by Quizilla

Your Match Is Billy...well not really...because
Billy's MINE! We'll just say that you're most
compatible with him... Billy's unique and
artistic, and he's a guitarist (I love
guitarists.) And Paul says one of Billy's
greatest qualities is his kindness. He's just
a total sweetie. He's also got his own
clothing line: LeVeL 27. (Go check it out if
you havent already at level27online.com) You
prolly like tattoos, cuz Billy's got lots,
including a Nightmare Before Christmas one on
his lower right arm and the coolest Lord of the
Rings tattoo on his left wrist. (I love Lord of
the Rings!) And he's so sexy. Just look at
his gorgeous blue eyes (which look like they're
brown in the pic but in reality they're blue)
and his perfect jaw-line! (Yeah, I know...don't
ask...I think his jaw-line is so hot...and I
kinda have a thing for his neck, too...;)

>>> Which Good Charlotte Boy is Your Love Match? <<<
brought to you by Quizilla

why?!

2005-05-08T21:47:00.000-07:00

i swam in my own tears

sunday...mother's day...i woke up having this major head ache..mom's nagging me again...telling me i should get up earlier cause were going to Lanai...family outing chuchu...hay...so were there na..I hate my annoying cousin...so i was being mean to him hahaha...bad natali..BAD..!hahaha...my kuya asked "ano nga ibig sabihin ng GAY?"...sabi ni arvin[annoying cousin]...bakla...sabi ko...tanga masaya un..!aarrrgGghhh..Im so mean to him...!so I was left there with mah ate's and kuya's..and they were like...annoying me...driving me crazy..at the end i cried na lang to make them stop..!!waahh..disaster talaga..!
Got home by 5:15 or so...i was mad ...waahh..!!hell i was mad....were in the streets and i was like crying my heart out..!uH...Im with my ate....harhar...those people are looking at me like...anong problema nun?...!haayyy...

TAN

soaked myself under the blazing sun...hay..5 mins. later i was glowing red nah..hala....hehe...my ate and I raced for so many times and i always won..!haha..galing ko talaga..!!so as i was saying..stayed under the sun for 3 hours...so happy...didnt get too burned out...just right...

ON the LOOK out

Im way having more fun than i expected....swimming in laps...feeling the hot sun..burn my skin..oh..it was heaven..!damn..!then i think i saw this really cute guy cross my way...huh...i was like stoned...then he was gone...hayy...buhay...then were in 7-11 buying envelopes...noticed this cute guy in my right haha...his kinda short but his cute alright?!then we passed the church just taking the easier path and at the same time..looking for future boylet...hahaha...

my best friend is so damn weird..!!togeroNe...huh..!heck...i dont even know that..!he was like nanrereto huh...!the heck...nakakainis xa...!alam namang kakagaling ko lang sa break up tas ganon xa?..!damn..!

DREAM ON NATZ

2005-05-08T00:09:00.000-07:00

room raiders

wala akong magawa na matino ngaun..my mom told me to clean my room pero di ko nigawa hahaha...lagoT

boiz

yan na naman?!wala na bang ibang maisip ang taong toh?!boys na naman..!!!aaaaRrggHh..!!whatever...i cant stop thinking bout him...affected pa din ako sa kanya...damn...kelangan ng maghanp ng bagong boylet....ano ba tong pinagsasasabi ko boylet...?!word ba uN?!...hahahaanyways...bukas mother's day pero bakit di ko feeL?!...ay oO nga pala kacEe salbahe akO..!hahaha...pagnaririnig ko cEe joJo naaalala ko talaga xa...damn...sobra na tOh..waahhh.. i wanna scream pero inde pede baka magciNg cLa lahat..!!haayy...sigh...

ragnarok is everywhere

yeah it's true sa disney maynapanood akong movie connected sa ragna
"SOPHIE'S WORLD"may ragna na naman
THE DA VINCI CODE ano ba?!may ragna na naman..!!sa TEENTALK ang daming ragna adDicThOos...sa friendsteR soBrang daMi..!!bati ba naman sa blogskins?!hay...pOoteK sa aNimax merOn...pati ba naman sa RT?!...nakita kita sa prontera...haY...!!ayaw talaga akong tigilan ng ragna...!ang hirap kumawala...dang it..!ayaw ko na for cyring out loud pero bakit parang gusTo ko pa din..!!!waaahh..KUYA dan wak mo ako iteMpt na maglaro ulit..kahit gustong gusto ko ng isis i wont go back to being my addiCted seLf..ayaw ko na ung tipong walang tulugan times...ayaw nah..!!no..!!dang it..!!bakit bah?!oO alam ko sensei ako ng mga cLasSmate ko pagdating sa raGna perO ayaw Ko na taLaga..napunta Lang sa waLa ung mga chaR na pinagPuyatan kong paLvL up-in...uNg aSsa ko nihaCk ng kuYa ko...anak ng...daNg..!

mY frieNdster aCCount is fuLL?!

waahh..I caNt believe it..punO na xa..!!mga impaktong uN..!di ko tuLoy maAdd aTe aNne ko..!!!mga impaKto maghaNda kayO..!!buradO na kaYo buKas..!!haha.,..!!ang sama ko talaga..!!hekhek..!!soWeE guyS..!!hehehe..sO thaT's iT...I wont maKE anotheR aCcount in frieNdster..caUse iT's goiN to be nakakaLito sO...iLL maKe bura na Lang the oTheRs..!!harhar..!!

tuNe of The voiCe

baKit gaNon?!...nakakaiNis na..!di ko na maintindihaN ang sariLi ko...!nagiging salbahe na naman ako..pero bat pagkausap kita..nagiiba ako?...napapaaMo mo ako?..!teka aNo ba aKo?!asO?!...heLL no...taO aKO...hahaha...ayOKo na nga...!emotE?...!ha....!as if...takte nababaliw na naman ako..ano ba tong pinagsasasabi ko..!ewan ko na...!!waaahh..matulog na kaya ako?!etOh na naman aKO eH..!!insOmia aTtaCk..!!poOtaH..!!baka 4 na ako makatuLog...!may swiMming chuchu pa naman kame buKas..!!hUH...asaR...wak na kaya ako suMama?!inde...andUn cEe daNda eH...dapaT makasaMa ako....saNa Lang diba?...!hai...fawk na buhay iToh...

nasAn na ba anG bes prend ko?

hoY ROMMEL FRANCIS MARCELO PANGANIBAN ikaw ay aking tinatawagan...nasaAn ka na?bakit ayaw mong maGparaMdam aH?! buhay ka pa?!oO alam ko bukas na montHsary..cOngraTs..!2 months na kaYo diba?..!eh anO naman kUng faneT 29 may magagwa ka ba?!birthday niya uN eH..!!wala..na diba?!!hahaha...nakakainis ka na..bakit ayaw mong tumawag?!nagpapamisS ka ba?!akaLa mo ba tatawag ako sa inyO?!inde noh...patigaSan taYo...soBrang taaS netOng pride Ko paRa dumiaL ng teLephone no. nyO...perO bakit ko ba toh sinusulat?...cGuro dahil misS ko na bEs ko...hoy ikaw oO ikaw na nagbabasa nakita mo ba ung pinakamamahal kong bes?...kacEe poOtah..namimiSs ko na xa eH..!!SOBRA!

bakit ba inde ako makatulog ng maaga?!

alam ko kung san to nagsimuLa..sa poOtek na ragnarok na iyan..oO naadek ako duN..takte...di ko alam na ganito kakalabasan..pOotaH ung tipoNg waLang ng bukas kayA ngaun magRAGNA...kaya matutulog ako ng 3 tas gigicing 5 poOtah tulog ba yOn?!..nap lang yata uN eh..!haha...banggaG na baNgGag na aKo...anG moTTo ko 99% ragna 1% aral...pooTah...anOng kLase iyaN?!..oO pariwara na ako...dati yoN...tumigil na ang pagraragna ko..!ragna days are over tinapos ko toh nung magbreak kami ng eX ko...takte dun ko xa nakilala eh...eh di itapon lang di bah?!...tas ngaun nasanay katawan ko sa ganun...pinilit ko kayang matulog ng maaga pero walang kwenta mukha lang akong tanga nakahiga sa kama peRo aNg maTa muLat paH...hehehe..mukha na nga akong tanga...wala ng ibang magawa kundi manoOd ng animax pero walangya...3 beses ko ng napanoOd yung episOde na uN...giVe me a breaK dibaH?!ehto pa...ang dami librong mababsa pero bakit kahit isa walang nakapukaW sa akinG mapaglarong diwa?...haLa..aKOy nagiging makata na naman ba?!...LoLs...aausin ko na..impaktong isipan tOh...

ayoko na..sobra na xa eh

nasaktan ako ng sobra ayaw ko ng magtiwala pah...pero bakit ganun...konting kulit mo lang konting tawa napapangiti mo ako?
nababaliw na ba ako?nababaliw na ba ako sayo?ewan ko...di ko alam tama ba tong narararamdaman ko?..o nagiging corny lang ako?!..oO alam ko pag nagiging corny ako meaning inlove ako pero kanino?sayo?!nung una ayaw ko sayo kacEe akala ko mahal ko pa xa...un pala ikaw na...aNg gaLeng mo talaga...napapaisip na tuloi ako... tao ka ba talaga?..!hahaha..paxenxa trip lang naman talaga..!oO inaamin ko nOon pa man attracted na ako seYo...waahh...!aYan umamin na ako..perO di ko alam kung tOtohanaN na ba ito o kung may patutunguhan ba ang pagmamahal kong ito sayo...?!damn...emotional na tuloy ang labas ko neto...pero parang ayoko...ngayon ko lang kaCeE naaMin sa sarili ko na nasaKtan nga ako ng maghiwalai kame...ngaun ko lang pinalabas ang mga luha na itinago ko para mapatunayang matatag ako...pero natatakot na ako..baka pag hinayaan ko itong nararamdaman ko...baka maulit na naman ang walang tigil na pagluha ko...puso ko na kacEe ang pinaguusapan ditO inde na aNg priDe ko..!kaya paxenxa na lang kung emote to the max ako...nasaktan ako... di ko alam kung handa na ako pero yaan mo mahal kita...di ko lang masabi seyo...kacEe takot na ako...

swimming bukas...

sana di ako mangitim...hahaha...wala pa namang 12 di pa late..hahaha...1 min na lang...iniitay kong tumawag xa..pero pano xa tatawag eh naka net ako?..oh talagang nagaasa lang ako?...kaw naman kacEe natali matuto kang lumugar...ayoko na..di na ako aasa sa wala...di ka na nagtanda...wala ka lang para sa kanya kaya masasabi ko lang "DREAM ON NATALI"

nOt updating?...BuT why?!

2005-05-06T16:31:00.000-07:00

case no. 0010
in the future

what's in store for me in the future?...am I still alive then?...will I be successful?...or am I goin to be a couch potato?heck i ope not..!I wanna be successful...I wanna be rich...hell who doesnt?Im becoming more mature...now I know how it feels...the future is in my hand...my future is in my hand...I shoudn't take life for granted...I should strive for myself...yeah...aJa..!

case no. 0009
summer's over

for me...Im the only one who hates summer...I hate staying up late...waking up late..eating tons of junk foods...drinking gallons of soda's...I hate Hot temps...Im not a summer person..boredom....damn it sucks..summer sucks.. I want to go to school early...damn..! 'nuff said

case no.0008
missing persons

Oh how i miss my friends...their somewhere out there having the time of their life...while here I am..stuck infront of the computer...I cant help but reminisce..all those happy moments with them..the falling thingy...the laughing sessions...the daldalan moments...the "it's not my fault"....hahaha...inggitan mode...I hate you times...I dont wanna be your friend na...crying mode...break up...hush now...
kulitan...kantahan...kagulo na...I miss yabam[yael/bamboo] that's KC...
group hug...barkada pics...phone with camera's...I miss those tuksuhan times...damn...i really miss those dufus..!

case no. 0007
orange alert

I never wore a orange shirt...cause I think it's baduy...way back then... it doesn't compliment my color even though Im mestiza....[that's way way back then]...i really hate that color but why the heck did I wore a orange shirt yesterday -05/05/05- gosh...i just found myself wearing this cute orange shirt....waahh..!!!i hate it but i love it..!!Damn.!

case no.0006
fallen angel

Im one of them...Im the fallen angel with the broken wings... no one really knows who I am...the real me...the maldita complex..the attitude I posses..no one knows what I am capable of...my qualities..what Im thinking...no one knows me...how many times I cried...my hopes...my dreams..NO ONE CARES....

case no.0005
freakin' poet

huh...im not artistic...but why am i makin poems...drawin' anime's...?
sometimes it freaks me out when I start to write a poem..something's wrong...it's not me...not me...not at all..!But they like my poems...they told me to keep it up...but why?..can they relate to my poems?...do they feel the hurt?...can they feel my sufferin?...can they?..or are they just telling me those things to make me feel better?...who knows?...atleast this makes me happy...it makes me feel sappy...heck it's freaky..!

case no.0004
alone-R?

alone..a loner...that's what I am...I hate it when people...stuck up their nose to my business..i was like...hell...GET A LIFE!..I hate it when people pity me...heck...it's disgusting...but sometimes...when I feel really really alone...I want someone to cradle me..to accompany me..to make me laugh..to sing to me..to amazed me...maybe I need someone to entartain me...sometimes it's hard to be an only child...no one to talk to..no one to play with..that's my life alone-R forever...

case no.0003
nobody's girl

yep...it's true..no one owns me..no one can...I'LL never let a guy to own me...I can be yer friend...your companion...An acquaintance maybe?..but you cant own me...i dont believe in LOVE...not anymore...it's just a four letter word so it's bullshit..!am I being bitter?...nah mabe im just being a bitch...so whatever..!

case no. 0002
red eyed girl

Im planning to change the color of my eyes...in my pictures with the use of ADOBE..I saw this tutorial somewhere where it teaches you how to change the color of a person's eye...hahaha..Im planning to change mine red...hahahaha..GO..!!

case no. 0001
camera madness

our camera is broken....waahh...it's a disaster...!how the hell would i capture my favorite moments with my friends?...waahh..!!i hope mom would buy another one...[prays]

daNg it...Late PosT

2005-05-03T16:50:00.000-07:00

saturday night/Sunday morning ...

ate and I were in the park eating "pillow's" and ice cream...then there's this freaky looking guy....sat on ate's side and said "Miss lagay mo naman ung no. mo dito"...aaarrrghh.....hell...ate said it's scary..pero Im smiling pa din..hehehe...I slept over kela ate won...jez foh fun...hahaha...we slept in around 1:30 am...then I woke up 5:00 am...whoa...short sleeper moi?..hahahaha...when ate Won woke up...she said she's craving for corn flakes...hahaha..Im thinkin bout the same thing...so that's it we went to our house...ate corn flakes...my card drained..thanks to ate..so I was forced to use pldt vibe...waahh...i hope MOM wont be mad at me...[pray]

sunday

we went to SM cause it's sale daw...last time we went there is beacuse sale un pala....BUMER...inde naman...so aun nga...Mom and I were fighting...cause i didnt bring mah fone with me cause mah battery is drained... I was texting Kym...Mom told me to give her the fone...eh Im not yet done texting...un nagaway na kami...waahhh...I hate that day...then we went to JANSPORT cause Im going to buy na daw a bag for school...so i was like galit pa nun...so I chose the second to the highest priced bag...it was black and gray...and mom was like...what?...yan ang gusto mo?...eh kuripot cee mom...hahaha..Belat...bought 2 shirt's...my feet is killin me...waahhh...hanggang paguwi...nagaaway pa din kami...wahahahaha...!i was browsing ADOBE...so made fun ung mga pictures nila...*ahem* namin pala...wahehehehe...it was hilarious..ill post it later...when i finished doin my ultimate creation..!!

monday

last night i sleep 12 am..I woke up 12 noon...deck called me na pala...dang it...I was watching what i eat..cause my kuya's told me that Im becoming fat na daw....dang it...waahh...!!!watched everything in animax...ganda was here....she's so cute...there planning for a swimming eck eck for our family...sa sunday sa lanai...wahahaha...
missed deck's call...he called twice and i was not capable of answering the damn call...waahh..I miss my Best friend..!!hell 11 pm Rodel called and i was like SHOCKEd...cause after a year and half he called...anong masamang hangin ang nagutos sa kanyang tumawag sa akin...fawk...ang kulit pa din..pero di na ako makulit...waahh....nagbago na ako....di na ako ang dating natali na kilala nya...he's asking foh my email add...

Tuesday

woke up the same time....10 am...watched home boy...i was waiting for the princess sarah in animax...instead i saw digimon...what the?..!i was confused cause animax change the time.. Im still adjusting...Rodel called again..still asking for my email add...what the heck is happening?...im still healing my wounds...fuck...i cant do anything but smile...a broken smile...so aun.waaaahh...kaya ko bang burahin ang friendster ko?...di na yata...im confused...

waahh...talaga?

2005-05-01T23:46:00.000-07:00

i got tired i guess, so much trouble lately now i'm wondeing maybeit's all good for me.you travel down the road less takeni hate you being there.why do you have to make yourself heard?i don't want you near me. i made a complete fool of myselfi had my own shadows to blameand now that i'm desertedi'm finally feeling freei'm leaving youi need to find my way out i'm leaving youi need to do this nowmy tears are there any wayit can comfort me somehow'cause i never get to lose something i never had....

inlab?

2005-05-01T19:55:00.000-07:00

hahaha..im so bad..ubos na card ko kanina...pewo nakavibe ako ngaun..di alam ni mommy...sobra na toh..wahehehehe...maybe this is mah last post...iLL make pabili pa ng icard kay kuya tom...hehehehe..nice talaga kagabi...wala lang...next time na lang kwento ayt?!love yah best..!

fawk...fawk..fawk..!!

2005-04-30T15:22:00.000-07:00

*ehem*...nothin interesting happened today...jez sleep all day...aww its so damn boring...i wish pasukan na....waahhh.!!im munching on corn flakes right now...my parent's want me to starve..lols...kiddin'...pero im hungry na...i wonder kung masarap ang pritong puppy...?hahaha...as if naman...jez got off the phone...talked to joy....so told me na classmate ko siya dati nung nursery...wahahaha...i guess she's right...look up to OLD class pictures then haha...then there she is...hehehe

hehehe...i woke up kanina mga 10:15 or so...ang haba ko talagang matulog...waahh....we should have gone to SM ngaun..yah know...cause sale daw...pero unfortunately..di natuloy...cee kym...she texted me saying "waahh...were going to manila today sana daan kami sa glo para dun sa teentalk"..hehehe...that's not exactly what she texted me pewo..parang ganyan ung pagkakaaintindi ko...hehehe...

my pretty ate won texted me she asked me kung pupunta kami SM cause she's gonna buy new SHOES daw....i told her na i want to pero..MOM is not feeling well kacee...wahahaha....anlakas ng trip...wahahahaha.....yun na un...

missed them....fawk it..!

2005-04-29T19:17:00.000-07:00

yesterday when i was watching gundam wing "Heero"...ahhh heaven Im totally crushing on him ahh...my dad called me and I was liked surprise cause he gave me a box of chocolate...hahaha..color me surprise...why the heck would my dad gave me a box of chocolate aye?...i dunno why but the chocolate is great its so yummy...hehehe...Dex called me again but i didnt got the chance to talk to him cause his mom told him to buy something in the supermarket or something like that so he hung up on me...his in laguna right now...lucky him...i wanna get out of this house it's crowding me...its crumbling over me...~~its gonna swallow me...whole...~~ aww heck im just feelin' lonely again...just watched the mtv of Lonely by Akon the little voice is so cute...hehehe...Im Listening to Rt right now and their talking bout star wars...hehe.. personally i like Hayden Christensen..His so damn cute...harhar... my classmates wanna go to school na...cause our vacation is so Long... I wanna meet our new classmate...wish kuya dylan is one of them...haha
i started calling him kuya...uh-oh...this means only one thing..~~im starting to like him~~....eeck...anyways i really miss those dopes... i wanna go to school na....i want go to our stat room...kahit wala na kaming stat..go ma'am lee pa din...tamabay sa faculty...inom ng tubig..hingi ng food...hahaha...beggars could not be choosers...i miss those gooofing around day's waahh....i really miss them....miss my best friends...i miss Ms.Lizardo... i miss cleaning the room... i miss shouting in our room... singing NUMB over and over again...miss my peers..miss my partners in crime...miss my seatmate... i'll surely miss mark and larri i heard their gonna transfer somewhere else cause their moving or something...i miss my guildmates...miss those hackers... miss toni's phone...hell his like changing phone every 2 weeks or so...same goes with aljun...i miss tetu's phone...i got so many pictures there... i miss those i didnt do it thingy...sorry for being late...sorry i didnt do my homework...sorry didnt study for today...hahaha...mga parusa nila maam Llaneta...drop na sa S.S pag walang assignment...hahahaha...go to the library to do your supposed to be homework...those asaran sessions with KC..picture sessions with joy's digicam...toni's cellphone.. sigawan session with keith...and trippin' session with animae...waahhh...im forcing myself to cry but i cant...heck...what's wrong with me?.!im not normal..!

nandito nakaukit parin sa puso ko...ng sabihin mong wag na lang...nandito nakatatak parin sa isip ko...kung paano mo tinalikuran ang lahat...kay bilis...bat umalis...nakakamiss..nabigla ng di ko man lang nalaman na mawawala...ng biglaan...di ko man lamang naisip na idahan dahan...di ako sanay sa biglaan unti unti na lang sanang nawala...

- biglaan by 6 cyclemind

bakit ganito ang pagibig pagibig?..ganyan talaga masaya...ah...

you talk to much mother-fucker hush...

im stronger now im stronger now than i was before there's no way you can hurt me...move me...stop me..

galing talaga ng bamboo...wahahaha...ang galing..waahhh..!!

sorry na talaga kung ako'y medyo tanga

let's do the funk...let's do the first day funk

bakit ba parang nanadya ang life?..

lahat ng bagay na dapat masaya...nagiging malungkot...

shit napapakalufet...lahat na lang ng nararamdaman ko nasa isang kanta na..pero...i hate that song...ayaw ko fuck fuck fuck..!

Dangerous wounds

Pain is good so they say
But hey me love pain
Weird?
Hey that's my middle name!

The wounds you've caused me
Are very deep and painful
But baby hey...!chill
Im gonna be -a ok

The thing is im kinda getting used to this
The hurtin
the pain im feelin
it hurts so badly

Sometimes I don't feel anything
"Numb" as the boys of linkin says
ill just stay here in my favorite dark corner
thinking bout you
maybe im hoping that youll love me too
but who am I kidding?me myself and I?
Im here again mesmerizing..dreaming..dreaming that someday wounds ould heal
Even thought it hurts so damn much I know im gonna be alright

Feeling that im still gonna win
Ill continue loving you
Its not a sin
I know that youll always be my boo

Even if you don't feel the same
Ill keep striking and fighting
No matter what happen
Ill be right here

My wounds are bloody
And their killin me
But im not gonna go
Ill be standing my ground...proud

Scars

After healin my wounds
Im still here..waiting..fighting..huting
Even though..
I know im just losin my grip on you

Suffering from those wounds made me realizes
That a broken nose
Should be hospitalized
I dunno where are you
I dunno if I should hope
I keep texting you and calling you
But still no response from you

I thought that after receiving the pain
The terrible horrible pain
Ill learn my lesson
But heck my stupid heart is sad

When your gone...life is a misery
All the happy memories
Are rushin back to me
When I hear our song playin'

Ill get over it
I know I will
I should
I shall

The dangerous wounds are healed
There's no trace of the past
The only thing that's left
is nothing but scars

hay naku..mga poems na lang ang kaya kong gawin...heck..ang hirap neto...nagiging makata na naman ako...hala na...

just finished reading "The Da Vinci code"...aus ah..naimpluensyahan ata ako...hala na...anti-christ na bah ako?...heck NO..!medyo nabitin ako...bakit ganun ang ending?...andaming useful information dun...tas andun pa cee bapho...isis...osiris.....ragnarok talaga...kahit saan sinusundan ako...tsk..tsk..tsk..pero infairness...ang galing ni Brown...hahanapin ko ung isa pang novel niya...sabi ni ate Ky madanda daw un...hahahaha...fawk...sheyt...ang haba ng post ngaun ah?...cant believe it..!darkness is approching so damn fast...ano kayang color ng moon ngaun?..last time i checked it was orange...after i post this this...ill check my mail..then check teentalk foh a moment..then ill scram...gonna talk to animae bout something...waaahh miss ko na cee patrickbabes..hahahaha...

jez fuck it..!

2005-04-27T20:56:00.000-07:00

Hell I'm hyper right now.. I don't wanna sleep and I don't wanna eat.. All I wanna do is surf the net.. Update my blog.. Read books.. Talk on the phone.. And let my load expire.. hell.. it was pure hell.. Yesterday it was Animae and Tets monthsary.. At last after 5 months of courting. He deserves to be loved by her..baby.. Whatever.. Enough about them...

I don't wanna run away but I cant take I don't understand if I'm not made for then why does my heart tell me that I am.. is there anyway that I can stay in your eyes..

Fuck..once in your life your best friend dedicates a song to you..now that's the song..what the fuck?.! Hell.. I talked to Dex yesterday.. I told him na my ex broke up with me.. And he was like..."ha?butinga"..Then chuckles and laughter..then he said..."akin talaga puso mo.." WTH? Pootek..I was like "ha?..anoh daw?" then tawa...para kaming tanga..that's normal naman eh...once in your life you should allow yourself to be silly to look silly.. to feel silly... so back to the topic.. Then I told him the story.. He cant help himself..he burst in laughter...I said, "o tama na bata baka tumaba ka sa hangin".. So he stopped.. Ask what's the name of the guy.. I don't wanna give it to him knowing him yun ang ipapangalan nya sa next dog nila... I can still remember that eman guy... I told Dex na ang bait bait ni eman sa akin... then bigla na lang niyang sinabi eman?..ung German shepherd namin?..hahaha…hala na.. woo shoo.. I told him na that guy is in my friendster naman eh.."I don't know nga the name.. sabihin mo na kacee" I told him to look in the testimonials "siya lang naman Lalaki dun eh"... nye nagtampo siya "pano naman ako?" I was like "oo nga noh?"..hehehe... he told me to cry.. tas pagkaiyak ko daw tatawa siya.. loko mo..then his tone became serious "Natali cry lang.. mahirap yang dalhin eh..sige ka"..hahaha..instead I laughed "di pa buhay ang taong makakapagpaiyak sa akin".. Correction Lalaki... we talked about WrestleMania 21.. I told him na John Cena won.. and he was like.."oh?".. He liked Batista and Orthon [tama spelling?..sorry im so innocent pa sa smackdown].. That triple H Lost.. Batista won.. The Undertaker.. Won again.. Orthon lost.. JBL lost.. harhar.. nagloko na naman..he told me na magmemessage daw siya kay Jayson.. "Nice job pare..turuan mo nga ako nun".. hahaha.. bagay silang magkasama.. hahaha... "tangina naman oh"..sabi nya "tangina nagmumura ka na ah?"..hahaha…I was so shocked because that guy is like so BANAL..
He's the sole reason why I wear my hair long.. But now Im having doubts na... I wanna cut it na.. It's so hot eh.. I told him na last week when my ex broke up with me.. My puppy died.. sabi nya "ispin mo na lang nawalan ka ng tuta..pagnaiisp mo siya namatay na siya..ang tuta..tuta lang siya"..hehehe.. aus reverse psycho something ah?..may balak kang maging shrink?..it’s working naman.. wala na sa akin ung nagbreak kami... I was waiting for that for a long long long time ago..way back then.. nakakasawa na siya eh... sabi ni animae.. ang sama ko daw girlfriend.. hahaha..as in ang sama.. That’s another story..anyways.. I really love my best friends.. lagi silang nandyan para sa akin...kahit napapakasama ng ugali ko... support to the max pa din sila..ung isa..todo support sa pagwiwiz ko..ung isa.. “walangya yang boyfriend” mo..ung isa naman “iyak ka lang”... oh san ka pa?hahaha..balik tayo kay Dex sabi nya he’s becoming taller na daw... hahaha... go lang... Maybe his 5”9 or 5”10?... so yun na nga...he wants me to cry...he tried...failed..”walang makakapagpaiyak sa akin kahit magpakamatay ka sa harap ko..tatawanan pa kita”..hay naku guys talaga... ill keep waiting for him... kahit may girldfriend siya ngaun... paki ko sa girlfriend nya... hala... sumasama na ako... he told me naman eh... 1 month and 20 days pa lang sila nung girl nya...mind you... nibase nya sa basketball ung monthsary nila... whaapak...!ano kaya un...!?hahaha...gago talaga... sige dex makipaglaro ka pah..malakas ang KARMA nyan...hahahaha... buti di pa ako nakakarma..hahaha..mabuhay ang mga players..mabuhay tayo..go us..!!PLAYERS..!fuck..!

And dami kong nakausap kahapon...

Tetu is one of them...

I told him na I wanna grow taller pa... he said "what?" baka matakot na sayo mga guys... aus na yan..matangkad ka na eh...hehehe..cee tetu..parang kambal ko... halos lahat ng bagay magkaparehas kami ng gusto..heartthrob sa school...pano ang lalim ng dimples wahahaha... ang cute ng dimples nya..wakokokokkoko..cee Dr.Love sabi ni animae.. hahaha... magpapataba daw siya..para san pa?..quiet sobra...mysterious effect pa siya... hahaha

Animae

She was like galit na galit kahapon..cause of Jayson.. I told her not to call pero makulit eh... tumawag pa... nabadtrip tuloy... hahahaha...sorry siya..ang kulit eh…ang kulit talaga...un lang masasabi koh…she ask me to call tetu..makipagkulitan daw ako dun...hahaha... tas she's gonna call Jayson...things got a whole lot uglier after that...
Sabi nya...kawawa na daw ang boyfriend ko... kacee ang sama ko daw na girlfriend... siguro nga... ang tagal ko ng sinabi sa kanya na ayaw ko na... last month pa yun eh... ang sama ko daw talaga... uh if she only knew...oh ngaun... galit na galit na siya kay jayson...? wahaahahaha... buhay nga naman... jez fuck it..!

Animae – Jayson

Nakakaasar daw sabi ni mae... napapakawalanghiya.. lahat na ng words na negeative ung meaning sinabi nya kay Jayson wahahahaha... I told her not to call pero no..go lang ng go... napagkamalan pang ako daw ung tumawag?..hahaha..asa... magkamatayan na... inde ako tatawag sa bahay ng kahit sinong Lalaki... maliban na lang sa kapatid ko..err..kambal pala... ang babaw talaga ng reason... pero mas mababaw ang reason ko... hahahaha..nauubusan siya ng load?..heck..loadan ko siya ng 1k eh..ako naman nagsawa agad ako...hahaha... ayaw ko ng ganun... nakakapeste... binalik niya ang dating ako... I can still remember those times..binihusan ko ng water ang classmate ko..nabungi ung isa kong classmate dahil sa akin...nagkaron ng napapakadaming scars cee vj dahil sa akin... nagugulpihan kami ni dex..war freak ako..fuck..war freak ako dati..binalik na naman niya ako..fuck..!eto na nga.hell talaga..!may girlfriend na siya?..Christine 16..date sa damuhan?hahaha..ano ba yan damuhan..wala deadma lang ako..paki ko ba sayo?..wala na tayo kaya hell... wala nang pakielamanan..sinong iiyak para sayo?... walang iyakan dito... wala lang naman sa akin ang nangyari... parang nawalan lang ako ng tuta... last week lang yun nangyari ayt?..nakamove on na ako..nilibing ko na ang tutang yon..nilibing na kita... ang totoo naglalaro lang naman tayo diba?...nagsawa na ako eh... game over na... mas masaya sana kung sa ragna ko to tinapos... eh madaming makakaalam kaya ayan dito na lang... baka hamunin ka pa ni dan ng pvp eh...fuck..oo nga pala hinahamon ka na nya...hahahaha..oh siya na..lumalabas na naman ang ugali ko...

Tama na...ayaw ko na... nood pa ako C.S.I hehehehe... saka na lang ung post na matino..jez fuck it..!

LetteR?

2005-04-26T09:18:00.000-07:00

I made a huge fuss in “TEENTALK” when I told them that Jayson broke up with me.
Their so nice..."ATE’s” you all rock BIG time..!! Thank you for supporting me all the way no questions asked...you know who you are...I really mean it...as for my best friend CHRISTINE...yeah you’re right...”Lalaki lang yan”..Kym I know you don’t like Jayson…same goes with my peers..Even though I didn’t listen to you way back then still you’re here for me telling me to be strong..saying that I should put my acts together encouraging me..Animae I hope your happy right now you’re the person that hate Jayson’s guts..so damn much..I can still remember that baby..Ammi thanks for the very intellectual explanation…about my situation..you’re a really BIG help…the SUPERMODEL Lei...he’s not my life I can move on..!Ate Ria-islash-La ampootah kaya natin toh..!just hang in there.! Ate Ekz..don’t be sad I know Kuya Eni will come back to his senses SOON…Happy Birthday..! Ate Gotch “girls don’t say ex we say next” hehe..you never fail to make me smile..Saberbashocho”netzkie” yoh…!I hope your doin fine right now…I know you have a fever or something like that..but hey..! Soon it’s going to be “MAY”..hey nag rhyme..!My “ATE’s” in “TEENTALK” im sorry if I failed to put your name here...but you know whom you are..I love you all..!!..So the story here..Wednesday April 20 2005..im making my poems…im watching this anime “Midori Days” the Last title was “Sudden Goodbye”..my heart pounded like crazy..it seems like my hands have their own mind..they wrote 10 stanza or so..without realizing that this poem that I made is for “JAYSON”..it’s weird I was so amazed by my creation that I read it over and over again..then I came to my senses..the reason why I wrote that poem is because I was ready to let him go..so I decided that the following day I would send this to “JAYSON”..its weird..really..early in the morning I woke up as if someone’s telling me something..or someone’s calling me..then the voice became more clear to me..I don’t know if im dreaming or hallucinating either way im half unconscious then…I saw his face I saw “Jayson” he touched my face and said “Im sorry baby if I didn’t call you or text you…Im sorry..”
When I was fully awake I smiled if that was a dream..hell what a dream that it is..!
I was really happy that day..I even told myself im not going to be a rebel anymore… I washed the dishes…cleaned my room sweep the floors..I was planning to floor wax the floor but laziness came over me…so I cleaned myself took a bath put on something decent and went down..opened the computer...”hell it’s almost a week since I opened my mail I wonder if someone misses me”..so I was surprised to see Ehjhay testi…him of al people...his the most unlikely to give me a testi...then my eye caught something in the computer “testimonial from Jhayson” I was like “abah my testi din sa akin...” when I was opening the mail..I thought of something”oh yeah my poem ill give it to him nga pala”so I went upstairs to get the folder where I put all my poems..I read that poem over and over again…I was wondering what will his reaction be..so I opened the testimonial
My mind was like “boo makikipag break ka na bah sa akin?” so I was not surprised bout the testi..i even laugh when I read it..but even though I was laughing I know my heart cant take it…hell I even slap myself..so I went upstairs..again..get the rest of the poems I wrote for him and read them again..I didn’t realized that I was so busy convincing myself na Jayson still loves me..na I rejected the fact na all this time pala...all those poems I wrote for him were my true feelings my hidden thoughts...na I don’t like na…that im tired of waiting for him..that im so damn tired of waiting that im willing to give him up…cause this pain is killing me..the truth is nagkalabuan na kami..or my third party na involved heck I don’t care …not anymore…it’s up to him if he still wants my friendship..yoh man..Jayson if your reading this…walang galit sayo..sila lang..ung mga ate ko sa teentalk anyways…im not angry with you..all I wanna say is thank you..for everything…for the love..kung meron nga..for the time...for those memories...they wont be wasted ill cherish them forever..yuck naging corny na naman ako…that’s it..!!this post is full of shit.!

John Cena?!you rock!

2005-04-25T22:03:00.000-07:00

Last night I was playing with the pups their so adorable..I specially liked the brown one...he keeps on chewing on my shorts..hehe...and oh yeah the white one is the naughtiest. Anyways because of them I didn’t saw who won the match between JBL and 619.I wonder who won..while I was taking a bath last night I heard John Cena’s voice
I was like oh my God!...I really really I mean REALLY like him…the whole crowd was chanting world life... the champ is here...chain gang..woo hoo..!!I really like him

Im doNe...pretty hoT and taSty...blOody Ren

2005-04-24T19:10:00.000-07:00

At last I made it...! Im done...this skin...uhgh... I mean layout...is what I had in mind... hehe...you know it’s hard being a perfectionist...you’ll never let a spot ruin what your doing...I mean I made this design over and over again because of a stupid spot...uneven line...uneven colors...ughh...its hard you know...I like Ren in that BLOODY picture...It’s so nice...I might as well consider him as one of my ultimate anime crushes...Im so bad...

FucK!!

2005-04-20T09:49:00.000-07:00

iM toRn iNto pieCes..tHEsE haZeL eYes..naKakaInis...tHaT soNg iS stuCk iN maH heaD PLayiN oVer aNd oVer aGain..!!iS theiR a chaNce Na maY kapaNgaLan ka thEn you Like tHe saMe nuMbeR..taS frieNd xa nG boYfrieNd mo sa frieNdsteR taS maY teSti pa xa sa bOyfrieNd mo?..haHahaha...doNt miNd mE...iM tOo craZy to haNdLe..!!..iLL poSt suMthiN Serious LatEr...iM kiNda waCky rigHt noW..stiLL devaStaTed bY thaT naTaLi girL..

...tHaT girL waS mE...

2005-04-07T17:40:00.000-07:00

[[reGreTs]]

..waAhhh..

..i feel so down righT now..

..maH frieNds aRe iNcLuded iN the ToP eRrr hoNorS..

..i duNno how tO saY iT..

..i feeL so diSapPointed..

..aLL i caRE aBouT is bOo..

..oH hoW i wiSh iM noT thAt reCkLeSs..

..weLL i caN kiSs mY wiSh oF beiNg iN the uPper cLaSs goOdbYe..

..suReLy joY wiLL be iN sectioN A(1)..

..magdiwaNg ka kYm magdiwaNg ka!!..

..ngaUn kO nareaLize NaH paG naiNLove ka paLa..

..kaHiT aNong kLasE..

...eiThEr puppY Love LaNg oR maLakAs na taLaga aNg taMa Mo...

..daPaT numBaH ONE priority kO..

..dreaM ko nga paLang magaRaL sa UP..

..nakaLimutaN ko mgA dreaMs ko ng makiLaLa ko cEe bOo..

..shiT ngaUn Lang aKo namuLat sa katotohoNan..

..sinisi ko paH aNg pagigiNg aDeK ko sa RaGna..

..weLL aLL i caN do noW is SMILE...

[[SmiLe]]

..i usEd to smiLe a reaL smiLe..

..i usEd to lauGh a reaL laugH..

..buT wheN soMeonE broKe maH heaRt..

..maH smiLe is juSt a smiLe..

..mY LaugH is jUst a LauGh..

..nO oNe notiCeD..

..thaT maH LifE is noThiNg buT a Lie..

..aNd aFteR whaT ive reaLizeD..

..aLL i caN do iS crY..

..cRy becaUse no onE caN understaNd me..

..whaT iM feeLin..

..cauSe iM hurtiNg iNsiDe..

..aLL i caN do is SMILE..

..i toLd maHseLf..

..no oNe carEs..

..nO oNe ListeNs..

..nO oNe undeRstaNd..

..no oNe caN bE me..

..buT theN you aRrive..

..you've picked up..

..maH broken pieces..

..we werE aLmosT aLike..

..i staRted coMiNg ouT oF maH shell..

..staRtiNg to becoMe cLose tO yoU..

..iM staRtiNg to becoMe oNe witH yOu..

..iM moRe aNd moRe eaGer to be YOU..

..youRe the oNLy perSon..

..thaT i truSt..

..witH maH liFe..

..heCk i eveN loVe yoU moRe thaN maH Life..

..yoUr Like mah diaRy..

..buT theN suMthiN' haPpeN..

..yOu beGan beiNg coLd aLL of the suDdeN..

..i waS coNfused aNd begaN hidiNg iN maH sheLL aGaiN..

..up tO now iM stiLL hidDiN..

..oNe thiNg iVe reaLized..

..whEn weRe toGetHer..

..yoU briNg oUt the beSt iN me..

..yOu maDe me LAuGh aGaiN..

..The reaL oNe thaT is..

..aNd the bEst thiNg oF aLL..

..you maDe mE SMILE..

..buT thE questiOn is..

..whEn wiLL soMeOne LoVe me FoH reaL?..

..i haTe beiNg huRt..

..wHo doEsnT?..

..cryiNg iS a waSte oF tiMe buT i caNt heLp iT..

..the FeeLinG oF emptiNeSs is aLwaYs aRouNd..

..i duNno iF yoU eveN LoVed mE..

..oNe thiNg is fOh suRe yOu maDe mE smiLe eVEn thouGh iM hurTinG iNsiDe...

[[ThE moCkiNgbiRD]]

..iF feeLIng sO dowN riGhT noW..

..i caNt heLp buT moCk maHseLf..

..wheNeveR i LoOk aT the miRRoR..

..i caNt heLp buT maKe faCeS..

..iT's crazY taLkiNg to maH owN refLectIon..

..buT it kiNda maKes mE feEL a biT beTter..

..i'Ve cLeaNed maH roOm..

..goSh iT's Like iM liViN in tHe juNgLe..

..iTs nOt totaLLy cleaN..

..buT iM workiN oN iT..

..iM pLaNniNg oF haViNg a TatToo..

..heNna Lang Pow..

..i stOppEd LiviN foH maH aTe..

..reaLLy..

..i waS envious oF heR..

..beiNg the ALMOST PERFECT girL..

..niCe boDy..

..LoNg aNd soFt haiR..

..nicE heigHt..

..beaUty aNd braiNs..

..aLL iN oNe..

..obedieNt daughteR..

..a maGna..

..wheN iM wiTh heR..

..i feeL LikE iM heR aLaLaY..

..she maKes me feeL thaT waY..

..mY egO waS huRT..

..buT stiLL iM LiviNg foH heR..

..i aLwaYs do thiNgs FoH heR saKe..

..aNd i neveR geT crediTed foR iT..

..nOt a siNgLe noTiCeD..

..oR praiSe..

..i waNnA saY moRe aBouT hoW i feeL towaRd mY aTe..

..buT i thiNk iM takIng to muCh spaCe na..

..iM noT maD aT maH aTe..

..iM maD aT ME..

..iM siCk aNd tirEd oF LiviNg foR thE saKE oF otHerS..

..i juSt haTe iT..

..wheN iM aLL aLone iN maH roOm..

..i aLwaYs aSk maH seLf whaT the heLL aRe yoU doiN herE?..

..whaT's yoUr purpoSe?..

..aRe yOu suRe yOuR yOu?..

..aiNt yOu juSt aN objEct oR soMEthiN'..

..geEz foH cryiNg oUt LouD yoUr goiNg to be waSteD iF yoU doNt do soMethiN'..

..i knOw i shouLd stoP askiNg thoSe noNsense quessiE..

..i shouLd..

...i muSt..

..thaT girL waS me..

..iM aLL oveR iT noW..

..weLL kiNda..

..foH yoU besT frieNd...

2005-04-07T07:39:00.000-07:00

..i aLwaYs dreaM of beiNg witH yoU..

..i aLwaYs thougHt thaT yOU caRE foH me tOo..

..thE waY thaT i dO..

..thaT yoU wouLd retuRn tHE Love..

..iM secretLy ofFeriNg yoU..

..eveN thouGh the LittLe voiCe iN maH heaD is ShoutiNg..

..shouTiNg..

..oH yes deaR iT's shoutiNg..

..shouTiNg thaT i shouLd puT aN eNd to thiS misEry!..

..bUt i knOw..

..i caNt..

..i sHanT..

..foR iAm uNder youR spELL..

..you know iM reaDy t0 juMp oFf a cLifF jUz foH yOU..

..i thiNk iT souNd craZy buT i knoW deEp iN maH sTupiD heaRt iT's truE..

..i caNt teLL yoU hoW i feEL..

..bacaUSe iM afraId oF rejeCtioNs..

..maYbe iM jusT haPpy beiNg hEre..

..heRe bY youR siDe..

..chEeriNg you uP wheN youR gLOoMy..

..makiNg faCes wheN your doWn..

..maYbe iTs truE iLL be a martyR iF yOu asK me tO..

..shaRe yoUr gLory wheN yoU wiN..

..aNd be yoUr bEsT buDdy wheN whEn yoUr feeLin LeFt oUt..

..foR thaT's aLL i'Ve beEn yoUr besT buDDy eveR siNce...

..mahaL na mahaL kiTa kayA Lang hiNdi na PaLa pedE..

..dahiL nakAhanaP ka na nG iBa...

...youNg LoVe...

2005-04-03T00:34:00.000-08:00

..hEhE..

...iM so daMn haPpy!!!...

...i duNnO whY...

..basTa i kNOw iM haPpy!..

..nYe..

..waLang senSe nOh?..

..basTa..

..i caNt expReSs maHseLF..

..He doesNt waNt to bE caLLed "KUYA"..

...hE waNts tO taLk tO me eVerY secOnd...

...eVerY Minute...

..eveRy houR..

..eVerY daY..

..LasT niGht i dreaMt thaT i waS iN his aRms...

..aNd we're LaugHiNg ouR heArtS oUt..

...we we'Re So daMn happY that we didNt notiCe that tiMe paSseS So quiCkLy...

..tHen the cLocK striKes 12..

...i caNt uNdersTaNd maHseLf...

...i raN awaY froM hiM...

...i caNt stoP maHseLf...

...i caNT STOP!!...

...tHen i sToPPed...

..mAh kNeEs tremBleD..

..aNd i feLL...

..TheN I criEd..

..mY youNg LOVE was GoNe..

..aLoNg wiTh maH dreaMs aNd hoPes..

..everYthiNg was goNe..

..GONe iN aN insTanT...

...i caNt UnderstaNd whY tHe heCk DiD I raN?...

..aM I aFraiD?..

...scaRed?...

..hoPeLeSs?..

..iNsecuRe?..

..aBsuRd?..

..InseNsitIve?..

..wheN i woKe uP...

..iM cryiNg..

..tHen i saw MaH pHoNe aNd LoOk aT hiS mEssaGes..

..theN i reMeMbeRed..

..Im noT ciNdereLLa...

..mY Love woNt vaNisH eveN iF tHe cLoCk striKes 12..

...mY Love FoR hiM woNt vaNisH...

..iT woNt disaPpeaR..

..foR it wiLL staY iN maH heaRt foReVer..

..maH youNg Love..

...FOREVER...

...aNime...

2005-04-02T23:11:00.000-08:00

Your favorite anime character
Created by Grayangel and taken 4 times on bzoink!
Which anime are they from?	guNdaM wiNG
Name?	herO yuie...
Gender?	MALE..duH?!
Age?	16
Appearance?	preTTy HOT aNd TASTy..!!waHahah
Personality description?	guaPo...supEr!
Things they like to do?	figHtwitH theiR guNdaMs!
Special abilities?	...caN coNtrOL a obiLe suiTe..
Cute?	yeP!
Funny?	..no...
Type of clothing?	...aNytHIng..he'LL meaR aNytHinG
Any friends?	duo,trowa,aNd oThers...waHahhaAHha
Do they have a bf/gf?	uH-hUh...eErr kiNda...reiLiNa...
Best thing you like about them?	coOLneSs duDe!...guaPo...mataPanG...snoB
Least thing you like about them?	nothiNg he is peRfeCt!...oh snaP!
Create a Survey \| Search Surveys \| Go to bzoink!

..aYe..

2005-04-02T21:48:00.000-08:00

..i heaRd thiS stoRy kahapOn..

..naNg puMunTa cEE aTe woNskiE diTo sa bahaY naMiN...

..sHe toLd mE inaSwaNg daw siLa..

..nOt creEpY enouGh?..

..sHE saiD na tHe aswaNg thiNgy iS caLLiNg christiaN's naMe..

..AYE...

..AYE...

..AYE...

..sabi pa NGa ni aTe..

..."di nGa naMiN aLam kUng ciNo uNg aYe eH...

..kUng indi Lang naGreaCt cEe christiaN na xa uN"...

..oH maH gOsh..

..gOoD tHinG waLa na kaMi duN nG maGparaMdaM aNg Mga MuMU...

...mY reaCtiOn was Like "COOL GALING AH?"...

...YoU shouLd haVe sEeN maH aTe'S faCe...

..sUpeR nakaKatawa!..

...uNg paRanG gusto aKong sakaLiN oR suMtHin...

..the tHiNg is wala ni isa sa kaNiLa na aYe aNg paLayaw nI chriS..

..reLatiVes...

..aNd piNakaCLOse frienD Lang ni chriS aNg naKaKaaLam nG niCk Nya..

...kakaTakOT...

..AYE..

...i'LL do aNythiNg...

2005-04-01T09:29:00.000-08:00

..heY yaH aLL!..

..kakagaLing ko Lang froM ouR nigHt swiMmiNg..

..medyO baNngaG na Nga ako eH..

..aLL i waNt is maH coMfY piLLow aNd BED..

..befOre i LEt the saNdmaN spriNkLe maH eyE's witH sLeePing magicaL saNd..

..i'LL teLL yoU bouT the swiMmiNg...

...i thouGht were goiN to the LOCATION/PLACE exactLY at 4:00 pm..

..i was WRONG..

..uMaLIs na kaMi diTo mga 7:15..

..kuNg keLAn nasa kaLagiTnaAn na aNg guNdam WiNg..

...i was reaLly freEkiN oUt...

..where aT the baCk oF the truCk wheN suDdeNLy..

...nagtriP ceE kuya...

..he started telling ghost stories...

...and we listen stupidLy knowiNg thaT thoSe stoRies seNd shiVers To our spiNe...

..i waS Like iN a BAD MOOD wheN we goT theRe caUse oF kUya's stuPid stoRieS..

..theN i saw threE OH-LALA!...

...drOP deaD gorgeous GUYS..

..yeP i know tHEIr ToO oLd Foh mE..

..BuT caN yOu bLame ThiS giRL?..

..iF sHe haS a "RADAR" foH GUYS likE thaT?..

..aNywaYs..

...i knOw that tHosE GOOD LOOKING GUYS are frOM BeDa...

...mY aTe saY's sO..

..aNywaYs...

..we aTe BBQ..

...chiCkeN wiTh piCkLes?...

[i dUNno whaT theY caLL it..]

..PILLOWS..

[Yum yum]

..i kNow hoW tO fLoaT na!..

..yeY..

..gO nataLi go!...

..iLl posT the resT laTer..

...rigHt now i migHt as weLL consider geTting sOme "SLEEP"...

..do yaH haVe the tiMe to Listen to mE whiNe...

2005-03-29T16:21:00.000-08:00

..i hate this daY..
..yEsterDay the worst day evaH..

..graBe..

..i waNna be happeE!Foh cyriNg oUt LoUd...

..moNthsaRy naMen ngaUn..

..perO paRang waLa Lang...

..aMpneSs!..

..i waNNa whiNe morE..

..goT LittLe tiMe..

...heRe's soMe pix...

kYm[2003]

joY[matagaL na tOh foH suRe]

geline[2004]

mae[2004]

fHa...tsokoLate koH!

me[yesterday]

me wiTh showeR girLs[swimming 2005]

me[IN the POOL]

mae ang kaFatid na tetu[siLa na!...LET'S CELEBRATE!..whoOhoo!fiesta-BARAS2005]

me[last year>schooL2004]

maE and me[parang extra Lang ako dyanfiesta-BARAS2005]

..i shouLD be haPpeE!...

..i musT be HAPPY!...

..iTs our secoNd montHsary pero bakIT maLungkoT ako!...

..iM goiN...

..bYe...

..going gaga oveR avataRS...

2005-03-27T07:06:00.000-08:00

nigawa ni ate jeNn

goT that one from....Kym...

mE cryiNg...beCause oF bOo!

made this oNe fOh cLaire

foH aTe beLLe

fOh me...

foR kafaTid na eM...

maH crusHes...I caLL it pangalawaNg imbensyon....

..first oNe....

...you know im crazy foH you...

2005-03-27T06:41:00.000-08:00

im sorry foH negLectiNg you maH oh-so-precious "BLOG"
weLL im busy with mah movie marathon with ate won...yesterday i've talked to jhayson......asaRan...kulitaN...i waS like "SO FREAKIN HAPPY!"..i Love heariNg his voice iM getting used to this chitchat thiNgY witH hiM...i was like "oy nakita ko uNg crush ko ang gwapo...shocks!" tas he'll say "may nakita akong maganda kanina"
wahahahah...gantihan to the max...iM tired na..really...i wanna go to sleep...but i cant...sayang ang tiMe..waHahahha...minsan sabi ni joy "nakakatamad matulog" waHahahha....i was pissed oFf kanina cause the DAMN friendster wont work heRe in mah stupid pc...!!!i juz waNna change mah pix and look at the girL who spread the rumors in their school that she has a "PAST RELATIONSHIP" with jhayson...whatever i dont care..iT's almost 29..thanK GOD...!!!waHahahha...i've watched 13 going on 30 and ive noticed that the background soNg is crazy for you...i was Like Oh mah gOsh...ana mae caLLed me "isa kang tanga na nainLove sa isang ceLLphone"...i wanna know sinagot na kaya nya cEe kafaTid?...animae di na mashadong square ang mundo ko..>!!!
...oO na angeL ka na nGa ng JaysoN ko...
..waHahahha....

..akiniNiN daw bah?..
..nyTe..
..i must go to schooL bukas ng maAge paRa makiTah ko cEe maO..

..if a picture paints a thousand words...

2005-03-27T05:53:00.000-08:00

maH baRkada....weRe caLLed the maLditaHs....hUh...shouLd we thaNk our fouNder foR thaT?....

up:left-right: keith paula
down:Left-right: ana Mae, jona maE, rosario-islash-joy aNd me mAhseLf aNd I..!

iTs pieRRe oHmaHgoSh..!!!..i goT thE images FroM New York Minute..LOVE HIM!...*muaHugs to pierRe*

its maH "aLmost-best-friend-ALMOST"....
aNa maE...jaysoN's aNgeL i...!!aaRrrggHhhh!!..i couLd kiLL you foH thaT eih-eHm....!!!

aVriL's "HE WASN'T"....aVie..i made thaT oNe foH meaNgurLs...i hope aUra wouLd Like iT.....*fingers-crossed*

..this photo is taken wheN "INAAGKAP AKO"....
...know whaT thaT meaNs?....

..i look pretty..
..ohmaHgosH...

..i waNna owN onE!!!....

..thaT's maH favoriTe no. way baCk theN...
..oH weLL..
..yaH kNow..
..peopLe chaNge..

..GeT riGhT..

2005-03-22T02:18:00.000-08:00

...i dunno how to start this...

...here it goes...

..my day started EARLY..

..as in 3 am EARLY..

...im not in the mood to type right now...

..but i need to get this thing outside of mah head or else..

..it'll BURST..

..i mean it really..

...nakakatamad talagang magtype..

..maybe later ill try to type what happen to mah daY..

...iM sO caUght Up..

2005-03-21T02:10:00.000-08:00

...ang saya saya ngaun...

..eerrr kinda..

...kung di lang sana nagbreak si ralph ni keith...

..perfect na sana day ko..

..oh well there's no such thing as a PERFECT DAY..

..bati na kami ni ehjhay ung bestfriend ko "DATI"..

..wala lang gusto ko lang ishare..

..tapos problemado ako ngaun gawa ni boo asar mamatay na xa..

...niiiyamot nya ako...

..huh..

..madaming lalaki dyan na naghahabol sa akin noh?..

..peste..

...mamatay na lahat ng sinungaling *drop dead*...

..tinamaan ako ng sarili kong words..

...wahahahha...

..ragnarok is not appealing to me anymore pero i like it pa..

..wahhahhhahahah..

..ang gulo ko bah?..

..what i meant to say is..

..ayaw ko na na parang gusto ko pa din..

..basta un na yun...

..wahehehehhe..

..ung classmate kow cee animae..

..gumagawa ng dictionary ng mga taong SQUARE ang mundo..

...including ME....

...Tetu...

...Ung mga ibang adek sa ragna...

..at ung mga galit sa mundo..

..cute nga eh..

...steg...

..sana matapos nya sa 28..

..wahahahha..

..para mabasa ko..

..may nakita akong cat at cricket kanina..

..im gonna make a story out of it..

..just wait and see..

..bukas im going to wake up EARLY as in earLy..

..cause pupunta kami sa grad ni ate since may award xa ate mag sha..

..pupunta ako..

..support..

..can you beleive it i should get up around 3 tom..

...dang it...

..i love sleeping pa naman..

...im so caught up right now...

...i dunno what to do anymore...

..those times na sweet si boo sa akin..

..di ko napansin na di pala yon totoo..

..ngayon reality is here trying to keep up with my undying fantasies of me and boo...

..IM SO CAUGHT GOT ME FEELIN CAUGHT UP IM LOOSING CONTROL THIS BOY'S GOT A HOLD ON ME..

...iTs me aGaiNts the worLd...

2005-03-20T06:18:00.000-08:00

...HuH....

..today iVe encounteRed maNy misfortunes..

...aLl thOse thiNgs maKes maH heaD throB...

-1sT-

...jhaYsoN...

..i foUnd oUt thaT his ceLLphoNe is owkei na aNd the "LOST" sim card is fouNd na then why the heck didNt he tell me...

..aLam Mo yuNG feeLing na Un?..

..u feeL betraYed..

..asAr..

..KuNg nasa haRap ko Lnag xa nGaun..

..i havE punched hiM straight to his faCe..

..naKakaAsaR..

...whY the heLL didNt he tell me..

...paRa aKong ceE taNga diTo na naGhihitAy sa KaNya...

-2nd-

..anamae..

..nagroundeD xa doNt kuNg baKit ko niproproBleMa uN...

..basTa maLas..

-3rd-

..ralph aNd keith..

...TheY spLiT Up...

..bad triP dibaH?..

-4tH-

..inuBos ni moMskie uNg chocoLate aSaR..

-5th-

..i pity mYseLf..

..feeliNg ko balewaLa na Lang ako kaY jhaysOn..

..whaT shouLd i do?..

.. i love hiM BEARy muCh..

..i waNna crY..

...aLam ko na gaLit sa aKin aNg muNdo...

....iTs me aGaiNst The worLd...

..waAahh..

2005-03-20T00:24:00.000-08:00

..saYang..

..nataLo cEe paQ..

..CurSe You moraLes..

...juz kiddiN...

MeEt The caMwhoRe

2005-03-19T23:34:00.000-08:00

src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v691/NatzkieZ_29/Picture062.jpg" alt="Image hosted by Photobucket.com">

..thiS oNe's mY cuRrenT aVie iN TeEntaLk..

..iTs aLL me..

2005-03-19T23:20:00.001-08:00

..iTs me aLlright..

..aLwaYs me..

...maNaLo kaYa cEe paQ?...

..i waNna waTch buT i caNt iM stuCk eRe iNfroNt oF this daMn coMpuTer..

...i cant even plaY ragnarok in this stupiD pc...

...iM goiNg to buY a nEw web caM...

..i sweAr...

..iTs aLl oN me...

..pIx..

...doEs iT Look gOod?...

..iTs aLL me..

2005-03-19T23:20:00.000-08:00

iM so exciTed

2005-03-19T19:51:00.000-08:00

..Owkei people..Its official this is my 1ST posT...

..thaTs whY iM so exciTed...

...iM noT new to thiS kiNd of thiNg....

..BuT iM eRrr...

...NoT aN expeRt....

..ThaTs aLL foH noW..

..iLL keEp yoU posTed..